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In every family, there are conversations we’d rather not have. We suspect we’re not on the same page with our spouse or children, but the dynamic lingers if it doesn’t come up. Financial planning, however, has a knack for bringing those conversations to the surface.

That’s because financial planning requires us to reflect on the future and make decisions. It challenges us not to procrastinate, but rather be proactive. In many cases, saying, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” is how we end up with less freedom in our decisions.

You may have a fairly clear sense of where you want to go financially and professionally. You may have a clear plan of how to pursue that direction. Things get complicated when your family (particularly your spouse) is not aligned on the trajectory or the sacrifice it may require.

That’s why we see financially successful families who are also stressed and discontent. The relational tug of war adds strain across the board.

So, I would challenge you to reflect on these questions with your spouse. Alignment takes work, but it’s one of the most important investments you can make in your trajectory.

  1. Does our family have a shared vision of where we are headed? Are each bought in?
  2. Do we clearly see the sacrifices required to pursue that direction?
  3. How do we communicate honestly if one spouse starts questioning the sacrifice’s value?
  4. Do our key decisions (retirement, estate planning, succession planning, etc.) align with the core values we hold as a family?

Write these down, print these out, whatever is easiest for you. I’d strongly recommend investing the time in honest conversations as a family. Alignment is possibly the most important part of a successful financial plan.